[A collage of unrelated images assembled to look like the interior of a home. Left hand corner shows a picnic table with vegetables, a dresser, and an old TV with a house plant. Center frame shows an all-white kitchen with an open cabinet. The insides are pink, the shelves hold pictures of outdoor fields, flora, fauna, bags of beans, corn flower, cans of coffee and condensed milk. A child lies on a black couch bellow the cabinet wearing a white dress and drinks from a bottle. Top right shows the rear of a black car’s tail light and license plate ]
Dream house miniature from memory
1996 -- 1997
The taste of Nescafe stirred into milk by an elder
The low-light hallway plants that first taught you how roots can also drown
The aloe above the washer, the blind cocker spaniel sleeping nearby
The blue tiles that are now allegedly white
The outdated encyclopedia collection moved to the trash
A living room that appears to have shrunk with time
The smell of the bakery brought onto the marble counter
margarine, not butter
A Scorpio and a Pisces, married for 55 years, built the dream house to sit idly in silence for most of the year
She plants an herb garden four hours away
Building intimacy can look like
Two people taking turns while sharing the same ice cream cone.
[Two separate video frames placed side by side : The bottom halves of two people’s faces while in the middle of licking an ice cream cone. The faces are obscured with orange and yellow shapes.]
RE: _________
I have no recollection of September happening, but I know it’s behind me when I wake up and feel how my room is growing colder with every new morning.
Fall sunsets and early mornings in the northeast feel like opening a fridge when you’re alone in the dark. The red on the bricks of buildings look somewhat brighter.
7pm feels like 9pm.
Anything after 3pm might have to wait until tomorrow.
I’m sorry I waited 2 months to reply to your email.
I dropped some letters at the post office and felt great to not be scrolling for a bit.
I don’t always want to be the one talking.
[A brick wall is hit with a beam of light, there is a shadow of a tree branch hitting its facade. A dark, semi-open window reflects the green leaves of the tree upon the glass]
excitement at every turn…
A few years ago, I floated on an *actual* lazy river in New Jersey— right after plunging down a vertical free fall water slide. While I felt very alive upon my arrival back on the ground, I immediately craved the stillness and comfort of the river’s uneventful, warm stream.
[layers of pool water, sky, and children sitting inside of large, green and blue pool floats]
I’ve always been a proponent of slowness and silence, and I believe in the capacity of these gestures to bring upon meaningful actions and transformation. I started this newsletter to think out loud about how mobility and change take shape in our memories, dreams, browsers, and the physical world. Joy can be found in moments of stillness and reflection. Embracing these static realms can help us to better understand our relationships to space -- how we move through and build them out for the better.
Everyone’s right to mobility is being challenged and picked apart on so many levels right now, and reckoning with these new relationships to movement and freedom can be difficult or exhausting. There are days when I have no desire to move my body or thoughts in any direction. There are also days when I’m not sure if others want to constantly here what I have to say on movement. I’m taking more time to think about what this river can feel like by carrying us long term into something nicer and less solitary.
re-listening :
An anthem for entanglements, heartbreak, and now a liberating meme during a deeply frustrating year. Nathan Apodaca’s viral TikTok video to this 1977 hit has created a self-portrait template for the internet to present their most carefree selves in forward motion. With a beverage in hand and Stevie Nicks’ sorrowful vocals guiding us through this therapeutic outdoor journey, the open road ahead brings us the comfort of possibility. It’s silly, highly aspirational, and the perfect invitation to get up and ride away from what holds us all back. Live your best life, even if this year has left you feeling like you’re at your worst.
[Video still of Nathan Apodaca looking at his phone mid lip-sync. He is holding a bottle of Ocean Spray. An empty highway and open sky are behind him. To his left an right are video stills of different people recreating his performance. They hold beverages of their own and are staged outdoors on either railroad tracks or the street]
escaping : 💨🔥🌱🌊
When I was in the 4th grade, I wanted to be an earth bender. Now that I’m re-watching Avatar as an adult, I realize that my temperament might be suited for air bending instead. hbu?